Category Archives: Light and Shadows
I have spent my days at the Abbey sitting in the orchard with books I have borrowed from the vast library, sharing apples with Tinker and feeling at peace with the world. This is such a beautiful place. A stream runs through the orchard, where I bathe my feet and dip my hands and watch the minnows darting around my fingers.
I have been rereading Arthurian legends, and I also found a couple of books about runes. Runes are fascinating. I like to make my own out of pebbles, clay, crystals – something in these ancient symbols is so mysterious and bewitching.
My favourite is Raido, which means Wagon, and to Ride, and is a general symbol for travel. If I add Raido (R) to my own name, it becomes Grail, and I am indeed a questing soul.
The cup I seek is the Cup of Creativity. Is this the true Grail, from which all things flow, the Cup which holds the secrets of creativity for all who dare to drink from it?
The runic equivalent of G is Gebo, the Gift – the Grail is the Gift, for those who seek it, your own unique gift, for we all have one. To seek the Grail is to seek your gift, your true self. The runic symbol for Gebo is a cross – a kiss, a symbol of faith? The Holy Palmer’s Kiss was exchanged between souls who knew each other as they passed.
A is Ansuz, which means God, Creativity – so as I seek my Gift, as I travel in quest of the Grail, I am seeking God – the wellspring of creative fire.
I is Isa, Ice, a cold little rune frozen in time. Isa is said to be derived from the Germanic word Isan, meaning iron – but it is also the Muslim equivalent of Jesus, and is believed to be the name of a Finnish Goddess. Wherever it came from, in the runic alphabet it means alone, standing still, frozen in time. Sometimes that is just how I feel. I know my quest is often lonely, and I have often felt cold and frightened.
But finally there is L, Laguz, water, flow, the endless flow of creativity, running like water over rocks, flowing like rivers to the boundless ocean…
So when I feel alone I go back to the source, as I have come back to the Abbey. I drink deep of the waters, feel refreshment running through my tired body and mind, listen to the voices of my companions rippling like water over river stones, and know that I am not alone anymore on my quest. As the minnows gather around my hands, I remember that others have gathered here as well, seeking the Grail, as I have done.
In my cupped hand, the water sparkles…perhaps I had the Grail all along.
a musing – faucon
There are memories most pervasive
of thoughts beyond the lost words endured
in seeking truths as foundations
for my yearning, churning youth.
Then there are phrases caught forever
in the web of my patterned constructs
that guide the search for balance
on the fulcrum of my soul.
Two such glimmers of gifted wisdom
seem to be in conflict of intent,
and I sense that life’s mysteries
are found in such discordance.
“To love any woman profoundly,
you must love all women a little!”
“If I am to see love in everyone,
I must first embrace love of one alone!”
How can both thoughts be true in wonder,
if one must listen to mind and heart
to forge a plan of human touch
and echoed painless passion?
Within Phinominal Expansion
one might project:
“The relationship of the love of one
to the love of every man,
is as the ratio of the greater part
to all of love imagined”
Yet this universality
doesn’t direct which should be the greater;
nor if by expanding all love
the distinction may dissolve.
A mystic might cleave this Gordian Knot
by surrendering to Divine love first;
and then approach each new stranger
as both ‘the one’ and ‘of all’.
A pensive crone or wizard might allow
that ‘to love oneself’ is paramount –
with all love flowing naturally
from knowing love by living.
But, as a poet with a sense of awe,
I might leave such mysteries alone;
and just craft a lens and mirror
that thee might encounter love.
LEAVE it to ME
I am but a leaf on that Tree, you know;
Proof of creation and humanity —
Gifted to pull energy from the sun
And caress it into bright green delight.
Then I can climb — dream of distant stars,
Claiming each handhold on the concrete walls
That would keep me within my directed space,
Though I stand in sharp contrast to the clouds.
But surely I must fall, now free in death
To lie unnoticed ‘midst the bitter stones
That shield my roots and forgave my birth
To be more than a weed in a garden.
Down, down I slowly drift as softest snow
To brave cycle my drops of fervent dew
As tears for those who never had a chance,
Or still lie coldly dormant and afraid.
Yet I hear laughter — a feel dancing mist,
To float in a tiny pool of spring —
Swirling, cleansing, praying for fulfillment
As I shake off the dust of earthly toil.
Then a throbbing pulse and spirit rushing
Transports me to a gliding spillway
Of sunlight smiles and smoothest stones
To purify my vigil of awareness.
Oh, now to leap so free in timeless space,
Bound by faith and waiting depths of desire
To be one with all and send ripples forth
To join in song with a fountain of joy.
Gently I am kissed by flowered hints
Of still more life beyond perception;
A tumbling crash of chaos and mem’ries
Of a Source of simple innocence.
At last a place of peace and gentle rest
Where my last vestiges of humanity
Can molder away ‘neath soothing sands
’till rebirth in the Fountain of Lemoure.
LampLighter of Abbey Dawn
I am Trebusca, the Lantern of Shadows;
the shuttered haven of sheltered spirit,
and the protector of the Flame of Orbe.
I await for courage bold to yet unveil
these windows into my soul and lost wisdom,
and rekindle the candle of yearning hope.
Until then I hang in cobwebbed silence,
dingy with the dust of worthless memories,
slightly swinging in such chaotic darkness.
Legend may invoke your fear of my brightness,
made so if you choose to cast caution aside
and drop all of my shields in surrender.
Try but one at a time, my feckless children;
and desmudge the glimmering colored facets
that they might reflect the early morning sun.
Peer intently through these crystal lenses
with gentle wondering eyes of innocence
and simple loving bound now in charity.
Please breath softly on the glowing embers
of the passion of attention and creation,
and prepare to witness this born EverLight.
Then marvel at the burst of understanding
that this lantern of such ancient covenant
contains but a divinely polished mirror.
You are and be and was the spark of knowing
that by looking deeply in may dance without
and briefly touch the stars in our joined hands.
It takes but two, though more may profoundly serve,
that we may see ourselves in the laughing eyes
of friends and the open hearts of strangers.
I see in you the Light of we Namaste’,
and embrace these filtering walls of loneliness
that make us by choice so intensely human.